Broken Free (The Broken Series) Page 13

  He stood and made his way to the kitchen. He looked around, seeing everything in place. Everything perfect. They’d all decorated for Christmas after the baby showers, three in a row, one weekend after another. Figured they needed to get them out of the way before Christmas. Sofia was worried about the money, but as soon as the baby was born, or not long after, they’d open the bakery again and get it moving to catch things up.

  Daniel made his way to the living room and raked his hand through his hair. The uneasy feeling in his stomach grew as he gazed at the beautiful multi-colored tree with all the multi-colored presents—because kids liked color, Sofia insisted. He went to the nursery next and walked through it in the dark. He sat in the rocking chair and picked up the glow pray worm and pressed its tummy. “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. Amen”

  Daniel pressed it again and listened to it. The invisible claw inside him seemed to only tighten with each press. If I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. Those words played over and over in his head in the silence. He didn’t know God. Never needed to. But did he need to now? Daniel looked around the room and couldn’t deny the sacred and holy feeling there. Yeah. Maybe he did need to know God now. He was attempting to live a normal life. God was normal. Normal people believed in God. Normal people had a religion. Their child would be normal and would need that. A faith. That’s what Sofia said. He’d not cared one way or another, really. He didn’t really blame God for any of the shit in his life. Figured it was a reality of choice. There were good people and bad people. The end.

  But why this feeling of dread lately? Maybe it was always there and he’d not noticed it until there was good in his life. Whatever it was, it was the most terrifying shit. It said that things were too good. Something bad had to come next. But then that was pretty normal for him to think given his fucked up ruined life. Everything was shit under it all.

  But not anymore.

  He made his way back to bed and cuddled close to Sofia. She moaned. “Where were you?”

  “Checking everything.”

  She pushed her butt into his groin and reached behind her, pulling his leg over hers. “Everything okay?”

  He buried his nose in her hair, loving the smell of her. “Yes. Everything is perfect.”

  She suddenly turned. “What’s wrong?”

  He chuckled a little and slowly laid on his back. “How do you always know?”

  “I can hear it in your voice, especially when I can’t see you.” He sighed and she got up on her elbow and kissed his forehead. “Tell me.”

  It took Daniel nearly twenty seconds to dislodge the words from his mouth. “I’m scared.” The weight of that word hit him. He was about to say how stupid it was, but he couldn’t make light of it. He was nearly in awe of the fear. Respected it.

  “Oh honey,” she whispered.

  “For the first time, I have things I care about, more than my own life, and…I’m really scared.” He didn’t want to voice what he was afraid of.

  “Hey, how about we start going to church? Gammie has been bugging me about it.”

  “She has?”

  “Mmhm. Says we need to get our house in order.” Sofia laid next to him and put her head on his chest.

  “Really?” He put his arm around her and pulled her close. “What does that mean?”

  Sofia shrugged against him. “I think it means get your life organized.”

  Daniel thought about that. “She’s wise, I respect her. Why would she say that now?”

  “It’s what grandmothers do sweetie. They say things that are important when it’s time.”

  “So you think we should go to church?”

  “Yeah, I mean I think it’s a good idea, a good practice for our son. I believe in God. Do you?”

  Daniel thought about it. He’d never not believed in God. “I think so.”

  “I guess God wouldn’t hold it against you if you didn’t,” Sofia murmured.

  “No?” He smiled and kissed her head. “You think he’s awesome like you?”

  She giggled. “I don’t know, that’s a lot of awesome. But I guess He might be.”

  “We’ll go to church this Sunday. Right after Christmas.”

  “Oh, Gammie keeps talking about midnight mass.”

  “What’s that?”

  “It’s church like at midnight, the night before Christmas morning.”

  “Oh, let’s do it. We can video, it’ll be our first church date.”

  She gave a sleepy laugh. “Can you rub my back?”

  “Yeah, turn over.” He turned on his side and lifted her pajama top. “The bottom?”

  “Mmmmmm yes, thank you.”

  “Still hurts?” He rolled his knuckles into the muscles at the base of back.

  “Always. Feels like he’s wrapped around my spine.”

  “Ouch. We only have a few more weeks. And don’t’ forget you could go any time now. We’re right at the two week early mark.”

  “Wow,” she mumbled, nearly out.

  “I love you. Sofia.”

  “Mmmm, I love you Daniel.”

  Daniel inhaled deeply and this time found enough air to finally breathe.

  And relax.

  And sleep.

  Chapter Nineteen

  “I don’t care if she’s a Devil Worshipper, she’s coming to midnight mass if she’s living here.”

  “Daniel, honey you can’t force somebody to your own beliefs.”

  “No, but I can force them to midnight church once. Who knows, maybe church will save her baby if shit hits the fan, she’ll need an angel to deliver. Maybe several.”

  “Baby, stop,” Sofia hissed. “She’s my best friend.”

  Daniel spun from the bathroom mirror where he’d been fighting with a tie and glared at Sofia who stared at him with wide, guilty eyes. Beautiful guilty eyes.

  “Sorry baby, I meant best girl friend.” She ended that with a cute giggle that got Daniel hard. She stepped closer and her belly hit before he could get his arms around her. “You look sooooo yummy in a black suit.”

  She puckered her lips for a kiss and closed her eyes. Daniel smiled at the image for a second before lowering and tenderly nipping at her child like pout until it softened for his suddenly hungry kiss.

  “Wanna…fuck real quick?” he whispered.

  She snickered and pulled away. “Yes, but no, we’re going to get all frumpy.”

  “I can be neat.”

  She wiped lip gloss from his lips. “I can’t.”

  “Mmmm, you’re right, you’d what…mess up my hair?”

  “And mine, do you know how long it took me to get these curls and make-up perfect? Plus I need to go help Gammie.” She gave the perfect fuck me pout as though she were seriously wanting.

  Gammie called from the kitchen, right on cue. “Sofia? Did you get eaten by a rodent while looking for that bobby pin or what? I don’t want to be late for midnight mass, Jesus wasn’t late for the crucifixion.”

  Daniel snickered. “I love that woman.” He turned Sofia in the direction of the door and gave her a tiny push. “Before I yank your dress up and eat your pussy till you come on my mouth.”

  She gasped and looked back. “Daniel! Not fair,” she hissed.

  He grinned at seeing his words had hit like he’d intended. Right on that sweet clit he wanted to suck and flick...good grief, he needed to quit.

  He finished up in the bathroom and headed to the kitchen to find everybody there. He pulled out his phone and got the video recorder up. “Everybody smile, I’m getting footage,” Daniel announced.

  “I got scrap booking skills if you need to borrow them.” Seth’s lazy voice held a hint of humor.

  Daniel grinned a little. “That’s okay, Sofia will Google it for me.”

  “Ha, ha, make fun,” Sofia said, putting her arm around her grandmother and smiling. “I could get a degree from what I learn, you know.”
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br />   “A degree in malarkey,” Rachel grumbled before turning to eye Dara next to her like she was invading her personal space. “You can’t believe a word of what you read these days, it’s all propaganda and fairy tales.”

  Daniel didn’t like the eyebrow raise Dara gave, like the old batty woman was making no sense as usual.

  “What about you, you have to be in the picture,” Sofia said.

  “Yeah, hmm. Dara do you mind snapping a few?”

  Dara gave him a hurt look that said he’d just publicly disowned her.

  “Never mind, I’ll set up the tripod and we’ll get a group shot when we get back.”

  “Yes sweetie, good idea,” Sofia said with a dagger gaze.

  They arrived at church at a quarter to midnight and Sofia squealed as they approached the huge intricate doors. “Cinderella’s coming home,” he mumbled, smiling at her. If anybody belonged in a church it was her, his angel.

  At entering, Daniel looked all around. It was his first time inside a church. He’d seen pictures somewhere along the way but it was nothing like he’d expected. The weird smell fell away as he eyed the elaborate architecture and endless stained glass windows lining the massive walls depicting stories of he guessed religious people. It was…wow. They followed Rachel who seemed right at home, to the third pew from the back and settled in. Rachel lowered something on the floor and kneeled. Sofia was the first to follow suit and the rest did as well. It was suddenly clear who else had never been in a church. Everybody but Sofia and Rachel.

  Daniel eyed Sofia who knelt there with eyes closed and hands clasped. He lowered his mouth to her ear. “What are we doing?”

  She smiled without opening her eyes. “Praying.”

  Daniel leaned close to her ear again. “What are we praying?”

  “Whatever you want.”

  He straightened and looked all around at everybody. Not all were praying. Must’ve been optional. He looked at Sofia again and leaned to whisper, “What are you praying?”

  She looked at him with a smile. “I’m thanking God.”

  “For what?” he whispered quieter at seeing glances his way.

  She pulled his ear to her mouth. “For you. For my baby. For my family. For giving his son to die for us.”

  Oh yeah. He’d heard that term before. Son to die for the world’s sins. For the first time, he considered it outside of the realm of religious fairytale. He didn’t understand a lot of things with God and really was never interested. No reason to be. Guess it was time to learn a few things. At least be familiar with what they would teach their son. He could work on the whole believing bit later.

  He clasped his hands together and did like Sofia. He prayed and thanked God. Thank you for Sofia. For my son. My family. Minus my father. In fact, could you get that piece of shit out of our life? But thank you for Seth. And letting him find Sarah. Daniel was relieved and kind of amazed with how easy it was to pray and even thank God for stuff. He peeked at Sofia and found her smiling at him with a glow in her face.

  He returned the smile and suddenly mass began.

  The hour flew by with a series of kneeling and standing and sitting and strange hand shaking gestures. Then Rachel made her way out of the pew and got in the line of single filed people. Daniel waited for Sofia to get in line but she shook her head.

  He sat next to her and she whispered, “We can’t take communion.”

  “Communion?”

  “When you eat the body of Christ?”

  Daniel grimaced with furrowed brows.

  “It’s just a symbol of his body that was given up for us to pay for our sins? So we can go to heaven?”

  Daniel’s brows raised with I’ve got a lot to learn I see. “Why can’t we take it?”

  “We have to go to confession first,” she mouthed.

  Daniel narrowed his gaze, not digging the sound of that. Sofia leaned her head on his shoulder with a content smile. She didn’t care that he was clueless about all of it, just glad they were there together. So was he. He actually…liked it in a weird way even if he didn’t understand a thing in the Latin mass that sounded pretty cool with the echo.

  On the way back home, Daniel got an idea. “Since we’re all wide awake, why don’t we open a few presents when we get back? Have some hot chocolate?” He’d been dying to give Sofia a particular one. And Rachel. And Seth.

  “Yaaaaay, I love that idea, chocolate!” Sofia sang. “Was that not fun baby? Did you like church?”

  “Yes, I did. It was a lot of fun.” Daniel suddenly had his mind on Sofia and chocolate.

  Rachel gave a light chuckle. “Lotta fun huh. I haven’t heard anybody say that about church in a long time.”

  Daniel made hot chocolate for twelve when they got back and brought it in the living room, insisting on hosting the little event. With his video. He found the presents he wanted everybody to open and handed them out. “Wait, wait, let me get the video up.”

  Everybody sat with their gifts watching him.

  “Got it, go.” Daniel had the camera on all of them but his eyes on Sofia who treated his gift with such care. “Baby, it’s just wrapping paper.”

  “I knoooow, but it’s so pretty. I can’t believe yours are all wrapped so well, all mine look like crap next to yours.”

  “That’s because you insisted on doing it yourself. I paid for that look.”

  She stuck her tongue at him and then opened the lid to the small box. “Ohhhhhhhh my gosh, baby!”

  He grinned, feeling giddy as she lifted the hand carved ‘recipes for marriage’ box out.

  “It has our names, oh my God this is so sweeeet.”

  “Open it.”

  She did and began pulling out cards and reading them. “You wrote these?”

  “No, I had the cab driver write them.”

  She looked at him and laughed before reading card after card to herself, moaning and gasping. She stopped after a moment and gave him a tear filled gaze. “I love you,” she mouthed.

  “Man thanks for this,” Seth called out, staring at the watch Daniel had given him. Judging by that smile on his face, he’d read the inscription on the back that said Time To Live. Love Danny.

  Daniel’s heart plummeted at seeing Rachel sitting there, crying. “Rachel? What’s wrong?”

  She shook her head a little. “Nothing…I just…I once had a mother’s ring. I sold it when I was a drunk.” She shook her head. “Never thought I’d get another one,” she barely managed, her words coming out on frail gasps.

  Everybody crowded around and comforted her, Daniel at the forefront. “You’re the best woman I know. I’m extremely proud to be your grandson.”

  “Me too,” Seth said.

  More me too’s followed from Dara, Sarah, and Sofia.

  “Oh, honey, thank you.” She hugged Daniel’s neck. “I’m so blessed.”

  The doorbell rang, startling Daniel. Who the hell was that? He looked at Dara to see if she was expecting company, but her expression said no.

  “Who can that be?” Sofia asked.

  Seth stood up. “I’ll get it.”

  A bad feeling hit Daniel. “I’ll go with you.”

  They got to the door and Daniel looked through the peep hole. “Fffffuck, what is he doing here?”

  “Who?”

  “Lucas.”

  “Your dad?”

  “No, not my dad. My biological piece of shit father. Let’s keep this outside, k?” Daniel said to Seth.

  “Sure man, I got you covered.”

  Daniel opened the door and they both managed to slip out before the bastard could come in.

  “What’s the matter? You do want me inside?” his dad said.

  Bastard was stinking drunk. This was bad. “It’s late, we’re sleeping. What do you want?”

  “Day ain’t sleepin pussy cheeks, I can see through the fuckin’ window.”

  “You can come back tomorrow,” Seth said.

  “No he can’t,” Daniel said, incredulous.


  “It’s Christmas, you should let your old man come.”

  Daniel stared at Seth, pain stabbing him in the chest that he’d side with him.

  “Yeah, you should let your old man come pussy cheeks.”

  Daniel saw red and plowed his fist into the dead center of his father’s face, not wanting to miss. He flew back off the porch and Daniel ran to finish that bastard off only to have Seth holding him in a double arm lock.

  Daniel struggled. “Let me go Seth, let me fucking go.”

  “No man, it ain’t worth it, let it go.”

  “Let me go Seth, I don’t want to hurt you.”

  “Then don’t. Don’t make it all be for nothing, don’t make my hell be for nothing Danny,” he gasped in his ear. “You’ll kill him and go to jail.”

  Images of Seth’s naked teenage body, bruised and broken hit him like a fucking train wreck. Because of that bastard. That bastard right there in his yard. Then his own nightmare came slamming in, sideswiping him, until pain and betrayal morphed with his anger into something monstrous.

  “He deserves to die Seth! He sold you to that motherfucker!”

  Seth sobbed in his ear. “I don’t care, we’re together now, stop man!”

  “How do I fucking stop Seth? It won’t stop! It won’t stop!”

  “You even hit like a little pussy,” his father slurred, slowly getting to his feet.

  Daniel roared and tried to break free, giving it all he had but Seth held him tighter, sounding like a vicious animal. “Let me fucking go!” Daniel growled and thrashed. “I’m not going to kill him!”

  “Yes you will, yes you will,” Seth gasped in his ear, desperately holding on.

  Daniel felt so trapped. So fucking trapped. “You motherfucker!” Daniel yelled at his father. “You took my brother! You took my brother!” He thrashed, trying to get free, wanting his blood all over. “You fucking hurt him! You hurt my brother! You hurt me!”

  Seth held him tight, sobbing in his ear, the sound of a desperate little boy, desperate for love and protection. “Why!” Daniel screamed at his father. “Why did you hurt us! What did we do to you! What did we fucking do to you! Why didn’t you love us! Why!”